sometime on march 8, the huge poster of malcolm x in my room fell
it’s right beside the poster of che guevara and above my bed
it fell behind the headrest of my bed

i haven’t had the time to put it back up

sometime on march 8, aslan maskhadov was killed by russian security services
he was the last elected president of chechnya, chechens have been embroiled in a bitter war for their independence from russian hegemony for the past ten years

sometime on march 8, i started wondering why so few people care
there are so many people, yet so many are apathetic, happy with the disinformation they receive and satisfied with the status quo that they can — one way or another — make better but simply refuse to
people who’ve lost their hope in positive action

and i’m honestly wondering why i care
i’m probably more cynical and angrier than most people i know, i don’t naively force myself to believe that waving a placard is going to change anything
but i do know that the less people that wave the placards and refuse to acquiesce to the status quo, the more we will lose our rights and rights to criticize the status quo

i can go through university, accumulate a huge student debt, but i can repay my debt after i graduate and move on with my life
so why do i give a shit about rising tuition fees?
why should i care if some poor guy looks at tuition fees as a barrier to education?
why should i care that someone who doesn’t get a decent job will have a harder time to repay the debt?
why should i care that someone who gets a low-paying job will effectively be saddled with a debt with gigantic interest rates that he’ll spend the rest of his life paying off?
i’m not going to be that fucker — so why should i care?

once i get a job, i’m sure my employer will provide me with decent health, and maybe even dental, coverage
so why do i give a fuck if healthcare is being privatized? let them do whatever they want to do as long as it doesn’t affect me
why should i care if some poor sap has to take out a loan from a bank to get his kid a life-saving operation?
so what?
why do i care?
why should i care?

can somebody, anybody, tell me why i should remain on the arts and science students’ union at the university of toronto and continue to insist that the administration treat students with respect and fairness?
why should i make plans to make the quality of education better for students? to get them involved? to provide better services for them? to make a tangible difference, regardless of how small it is?
why should i care?

why do i care about the fact that aslan maskhadov died? the people of chechnya have no relation to me, i don’t even know anyone from eastern europe, nevermind the caucasus
the chechens are dying and russian recruits are being suckered into a war?
so what? why do i care?

why do i even care about malcolm x?
he died forty years ago as a direct result of fighting for people, who, now, for all intents and purposes are in pretty much the same positions and don’t even give a fuck about themselves
why do i care?

why should i care?

why shouldn’t i just focus on maximizing any and all things i can do for myself? why shouldn’t i view life as a zero-sum game? why shouldn’t i not give a fuck?

adam once called me the “champion of lost causes” — fuck, if they’re all lost, why the hell should i give a shit?

why should i care?